15th July, 2014.

Day 3 of buserelin today, still not liking the injections, but at least I know what to expect now. I have, however, experienced my first real side effect….. After I went back to bed after my injection, I had the most vivid dreams. First of all I dreamt I was shoe shopping with an old school friend, who was really good friends with Victoria Beckham, who came along too. VB was looking for flat, black strappy sandals, instead she found a mid calf length white tutu type skirt, with pink/iridescent sequins all over it, the sort of thing you would find in a child’s dressing up box. Anyway, VB loved it, tried it on, and was parading around topless, looking for a top to go with it. David Beckham then walked in, telling VB that she shouldn’t be buying new things, as they were on an economy drive. He then went down to the staff room, and made himself a fry-up, with black pudding, claiming it was healthy….. The dream then changed to me being in one of the lifts at the hospital I work in, I wanted to go to the second floor, but the lift bypassed all the floors, spun around, and opened up on the roof, where we were told to sit on the edge, where we could watch the comedian John Bishop hosting an underwater dinner party. There were underwater helium balloons, which were lit up so they would glow. JB was wearing a big glass bowl on his head. My dream then changed to me walking up the road, and I saw a bloke who I had recently challenged about inciting religious hatred (in real life). He pointed at me, and asked me to speak to him he then proceeded to start attacking me, and beating me up! It was horrible! My dream then went back to my house, where one of my chickens was vomiting natural yoghurt, I rushed her into the kitchen, bathed her and nursed her back to health.

 

And, the Husband also felt my wrath! I was a total bitch to him, and he was lovely to me, but did tell me I was being a bitch, we made me giggle. I also shouted at some smart-ass in the street who was having a go at me for not indicating, even though it was blocked off in one of the directions, meaning I could only go one way….

So, there we have it, my first Buserelin side effects……!

 

 

 

14th July, 2014

Day 2 of Buserelin today. I had a bit more of a meltdown this morning, the thought of doing this for the next few weeks was overwhelming, but I manned up, and did it, on the other leg from yesterday. It felt a little easier, but certainly not something I am enjoying doing. I’ve been reading up on the side effects of Buserelin today, I think most women tend to feel really tired, sluggish, and maybe a bit less tolerant, with a shorter temper – oh my lucky, lucky husband!  I had more acupuncture today, and felt very odd for about a couple of hours afterwards, slightly vacant, very tearful, but ready for an almighty arguement! Thankfully The Husband was very lovely (we’re both on annual leave at the moment) and just pandered to me. I hope this isn’t going to be how I am, but I guess I will know as we go on.

13th July, 2014

So, one of the most exciting yet daunting journeys of my life started today! I am so excited that we might end up with a baby at the end of this, yet scared that it isn’t going to work. I had been really worrying about the injections – not the thought of pushing the needle through my skin, but the thought of flushing the liquid into my body. Set my alarm for 06.25, so that I would be prepared to inject at 06.30. I prepared my syringe with no problem (benefits of being a nurse and a midwife 😉 ) then sat on the edge of the bed. I honestly thought I was going to vomit. I pushed the needle through my skin slowly, it wasn’t too bad, I liked the feeling of being able to control this myself. I very slowly began to plunge the buserelin into my subcutaneous fat. I was expecting it to sting, but I think I was pinching my fat so hard that I didn’t feel anything else! Felt so relieved when it was done, very tiny spot of blood after, but other than that, I couldn’t even tell where I had injected! Felt like a momentous step, like when you get a mortgage, proper grown up stuff. The Husband was lovely, touching my back as I did it. I said that some blokes like to do the injections, to feel more  apart of the process – he looked like I had pissed on his chips, there is no way he wants to do it! So, there we have it, I’ve finally started IVF…..

2nd July, 2014.

Eeeeeeeppppp! We’re starting IVF on 13th July. We had our clinic appointment this morning, TSH level is fine, it finally decided to come down with an increased dose. My TPOab have increased, which isn’t good news, but the clinic don’t really acknowledge immune issues. So. I’ve come home with loads of info sheets on IVF, we’ve signed out lives away, and I have a bag full of syringes, needles and drugs. Scary, scary.